Thursday, February 23, 2006

 

Bush Administration Calms Uproar After Announcing United Arab Emirates Company to Guard US Ports

Today President Bush reassured the American public that there was no need to worry about safety when a United Arab Emirates company gains control over a half-dozen US seaports. Despite the United Arab Emirates's financial support of Al-Qaida and the Taliban, Bush said, "people don't need to worry about security." Bush went on, "We have also enlisted the services of several Catholic preists to keep their eyes on boy's locker rooms at schools across the country, and Paris Hilton will be the new head librarian at the Library of Congress. And just so no one feels left out, Saddam will be back in charge at Abu Ghraib."

Comments:
"...Paris Hilton will be the new head librarian at the Library of Congress."
Good Lord.
 
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